Topic: Rizar the demon eater

greengecko on November 12, 2011, 10:53:19 PM

greengecko

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Rizar the demon eater:

North from Mhur Rizar there is a little side path. When we follow this side path till its end we find an entry to a cave. When we enter that cave there are two demons running out of the cave. We stop them and they tell us not to attack them. Now we get the choice:
a) Attack them
b) Let them explain
Case a):
We kill them, but we want to know why they ran away. So we have to look into the cave for the answer.
Case b):
We let them explain. They tell us an old demon legend:
Once there was a demon so huge he had to live in a cave away from the other demons. He never stopped growing and so one day he couldn´t come out of the cave anymore. But unfortunately the cave collapsed. He has blood all over his body, being jammed between the stones. He is angry and to survive he eats every demon that goes to far into the cave. These two wouldn´t believe the legend, but now they do. They run away and we want to look for that monster.
When we go deeper in the cave we quickly find it. It attacks us.
It tries to beat us with its claws and spits green acid. // It shall be a really tough enemy.
When we killed it its ghost thanks us for setting him free and tells us he´d rather burn in hell than being jammed between those stones for another eternity. As a reward we may take all the stuff and the gold he took from the demons he ate to survive in all the long time.
« Last Edit: November 13, 2011, 12:24:17 PM by greengecko »
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Comments: 4

greengecko on December 13, 2011, 08:29:06 PM
Reply #1

greengecko

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Here´s the dialouge:





Stopping the two demons:

You: Stop!
Demon: Go out of the way!
You: Why are you runnning away?
Demon: Hm.. Ok I tell you, but then you gotta let us go our way or we´ll fight you!

Choice:
[attack]
[let explain]

____________________

if [attack]:

After killing:

You: I wonder why they ran away. I should have a look into that cave.

____________________

if [let explain]:

Demon: My friend and I went into this cave. There is an old demon legend, I never believed it, but now I do. Once there was a demon so huge he had to live in a cave away from the other demons. He never stopped growing and so one day he couldn´t come out of the cave anymore. But unfortunately the cave collapsed. He has blood all over his body, being jammed between the stones. He is angry and to survive he eats every demon that goes to far into the cave.
You: So you saw this monster?
Demon: Yes. If you don´t believe us look into the cave. But now let us go or fight!
You: Ok, but if there is no monster in that cave I´ll haunt you and kill you!
Demon: Whatever..


____________________________

Finding Rizar:

Rizar: RAHHHHH!
You: Let´s see if we can tame that beast..


____________________________

After killing Rizar:

Rizar: Thank you. I´ve been jammed here for hundreds of years. Finally I may leave this place.
Burning in Harad´s Hell is better than being jammed between those stones for another eternity.
You: No problem. I´ll reward myself with your treasures if you don´t mind..
« Last Edit: December 20, 2011, 08:50:26 PM by greengecko »
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kalimgard on December 13, 2011, 08:46:25 PM
Reply #2

kalimgard

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Hm... demons begging for their lives are not... very demonesque. It would mean they are total wimps and then they wouldn't have gone into a positively dangerous cave. Here asking "What is it? You wanne fight?" seems more appropriate.

After killing Rizar the use of "hell" is ambiguous, because Rizar himself is a Demon and people connect demons with "at home in hell". I would clarify this by using "Harads Hell" instead.
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greengecko on December 20, 2011, 08:51:18 PM
Reply #3

greengecko

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Edited it.

This one better?

Still gotta get a bit more into the different characteristics of all the monsters and persons.
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kalimgard on December 24, 2011, 09:54:51 AM
Reply #4

kalimgard

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Yup, this one's good now too.
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